I feel like I am carrying the weight of the world and then sum. If I let my guard down for one moment my knee will buckle. I will then go crashing down to the ground. I don’t know if I would have the strength to get up. I didn’t sleep last night. I am feeling sick. It’s the whole package. I really need to pull out of this tailspin. On a good note a friend may get me tickets for Comic-com. I would be able to take my son. It would mean a lot to me. I really don’t know where I will be in the future but it’s looking like I am moving to the east coast. One thing after another hasn’t panned out. I keep spinning plates. The only problem is they keep falling and breaking. I hope to get the hang of living some day. I really need to take a moment tonight before bed and meditate on what is important to me. I have to stop focusing on what isn’t going right.