You can see a little bit of the orange sherbet for my sons ice cream cone on the art piece. I’m happy it cleaned up as well as it did. today was a long day. I installed stone around a fireplace. It went up 18 feet. it’s harder than you would think to make it look random. To have no pattern to the stones. It was fun to do something new. I always love learning how to do new work. I feel I could about build a house by myself. It was nice to have enough energy when I came home to do my art piece. I am going to try over the next 30 days to do a new piece. I once did it for three years straight so thirty days should be easy. (It’s never easy) But I have to do the work if I am going to get better. Until tomorrow.
Suffering through my first real dose of humidity in 19 years. Not use to sweating. Starting to get in the groove of living in a trailer. The kids love running around. Today the found out the neighbor has a mini horse. They about petted the fur off the animal. I’m glad ww are getting use to our new way of living. If only we had a car to haul this beast back to california I would be very happy. Should have bought a car/truck with a bigger tow package. Now let’s hope for a good night sleep.
Can it be art if you are having fun? Thought of the day. The wife and I have almost been married 23 years. We have been through the vortex aka life. Some days I think I love her more and some days not. Today was a good day. It leaned way more on the loving side. Have a good night.
Another long tough day. I am thinking of giving up my daily posts. I am so tired but I only have another couple of months and I have done a piece for 3 years straight. Need to make it to the end., Then I will decide what I will do.
So bust today i posted something on Instagram and am to busy to see in anyone like it. I wish it was for fun reason but no just work. Plus tired. Haven’t been sleeping well again. Need to get some sleep. My kids did make me laugh with their protests about going back to school tomorrow. The have really been enjoying their break.
Took a walk on the beach today. I have been listening to Ryan Adams Prisoner all day. It’s a great album. So excited. I wish I could see him in concert this year. When I get to the West coast he will be on the east coast. I have a lot on my mind about the state of my life right now. Where am I headed? Todays piece was inspired by the thoughts that ran through my head as I walked along the beach. I feel like my life is going sideways. I’m not moving forward or even backwards. I am on a weird trajectory right now. I miss being in California. I miss the energy. I like living in a city. We are looking for a trailer right now to move all our stuff back to California. We’ll hit a few national parks along the way. I think it would give the kids a fun summer. I am planning all this stuff without a dollar in my pocket. I live so much in the clouds. I have to get my act together if I am going to make this happen. Need to find some work. Need to sell everything that we can to cut down on weight. I can only haul so much stuff with our Honda Pilot.
Coming back to my childhood home has humbled me. It has broken me in so many ways. This is going to be a tough year to get through. I have come to realize I can’t do everything at once. I have to finish one project and move on after it’s done. I am so spread out right now. I have to focus on getting one project done. It will make me feel so much better. on a good note the wife and I are growing stronger in our relationship. I am rambling. Need to spend time with the kids before they head off too bed. Would be nice to watch a movie with the wife.
I keep exploring what it means to be immersed in love. For someone married over 20 years this is a thought I keep returning to. My wife and I have survived being married longer than a lot of our friends which amazes me. So many of our friends had what I thought better marriages yet they ended in divorce. We aren’t a very mushy couple. Many people thought we won’t last very long. I don’t know why one marriage or relationship last longer than another. We have had some very rough times in our marriage. We try to resolve things quickly. I think one of the things we have done right is to not hide our true feelings. If we are mad we express ourselves. We haven’t let things brew for years. The only thing I can say is that if you stay married long enough the bad times are dwarfed by the passionate times. There are some great years were we drank each other in deeply.
Everything is wrong with this years Valentine. I am flat broke. I have a migraine. The wife is at work. I am trying to take care of the kids while only being able to open one eye. They are beefing good though. That has really helped tonight. I hope to the end the night on a positive note. This year’s Valentine’s is blue, I need to turn this boat around before it’s to late.
Today was one of those days that sucked the motivation right out of me. I used it as a excuse to not work on my book. I need to finish the book. I need to fight the resistance. I can’t let it get the better of me. I don’t want to be controlled by my fear of success. Tomorrow I need to take control of my day.
I hope to keep loving you every day like the day we got married. Let’s keep the passion flowing even when we are old and grey. I am very tired and just noticed the piece needed a little work. May have to retool the piece tomorrow. I wouldn’t mind doing this whole piece in shades of red. I don’t like the color scheme so much but I was trying to stay away from red. Gustav Klimt did incredible pieces representing love using gold. The gold watercolor I have looks more like sand than gold. If the figures were dark blue I think the color scheme would have worked better. That’s the best part about art I can create a piece and then rework it a hundred ways. Each one feeling different from the others.
I hope that my wife and I never lose that romance. We have been married 22 years. We still have a very involved romantic life. Which explains us having four kids. That isn’t to say we don’t have tough times. Our financial strain of late has stressed our marriage more than it’s ever been. The good news is we put the work in to our married life. We feel stronger than we have in years. We have kept the channels of honesty open. We will be married for 23 years in a couple of months and I want to do something romantic for the wife. She has put up with a lot this year. I need to figure out what that will be. I would love to take her to New York city for the weekend but I don’t think our youngest isn’t ready for that. In a few years. Something to look forward to down the road.